Uncategorized

My Vision Board Worked

My Vision Board Worked

I started working for an international medical company and learnt that each year they awarded a first class, all expenses paid trip to the top 12 sales
people and one other lucky recipient. To win the prize you had to smash your sales targets.

The one other recipient was someone who can complete their job above and beyond what was expected. It was voted for by peers and the directors. I decided
that it would be a dream come true if I won. I set the intention (to win this award)
and wrote the goal down on a piece of paper that I taped behind the headboard of my bed and then I moved on. I didn’t dwell on it, I didn’t get upset
that it wasn’t coming true, I just set the intent and forgot it.

I continued working the best I could for a year and a half. I enjoyed the annual overseas trips from Australia to Paris and the Netherlands to attend meetings.
I travelled around Australia, sometimes flying into a city, working for a few hours and then flying home. It was an extreme goal as there were 10,000
employees all eligible for the one prize.

One morning I woke up and checked my phone to find 10 missed calls and messages from my boss wanting to speak to me urgently. I called her back worried
that something may be wrong and we needed to ship out a medical device for a patient urgently.

Thankfully I was wrong. My manager quickly said Hi to me and then said “hang on a minute” and She hands the phone over to the President of our company
who is in a room full of our staff from all over the world. He introduces himself and explains the setting they are in and then he proceeded to tell
me that I Had Won the Award.

I couldn’t believe it.

I was so shocked.

I was happy.

I was excited.

I was honoured to have received this award from all of the staff around the world.

I was screaming (once I got off the phone).

I won the trip for my husband and I to go to the Caribbean.

I few days after I had taken the phone call and the joy of the trip and the reality of what I had just achieved had sunk in, I remembered about the goal
I had written down and showed my husband the piece of paper. I had not told him about it in case he laughed or hadn’t taken me seriously. I also wanted
to show him that when you have a dream that is huge there is nothing you can do to control the outcome you have to trust in the process that the universe
has lined this up for me.

The ‘how’ was taken care of. Yes I took action daily by not just turning up to work but going above and beyond what was expected of me. The reward was
mind blowing. It involved a 10 day trip to LA, Miami and Antigua. Cocktail parties, private boat trips, zip lining in a rain forest, jet skiing and
business class flights and five star accommodation. (Feeling very special).

We had one free night, which happened to be our wedding anniversary and we celebrated it in style with a romantic private dinner on the beach. We had a
meeting with the chef prior and he had arrange the special 3 course meal just for us. The meal included cocktails, wine and our own waiter. Best of
all, it didn’t cost us a cent.

Months prior to winning the trip I had also put a picture on our vision board. The picture was at sunset, a table at the end of a pier, candles and table
cloth to show it was a 6 star experience. A romantic dinner for two in an ideal tropical location. Presto – I was living it! Two dreams came true at
the same time.

My vision board worked – jump over to the Facebook page and let me know what’s
on your vision board and when one of your visions came true.

Love and light Mikayla

 

Uncategorized

See New Things

See New Things

Eckhart Tolle’s new book is titled A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. I saw him on Oprah and decided to read the book to see what the buzz
was all about.

Quite a lot of my friends have the book, but haven’t yet read it because they find it too much of an effort to plough through. I had already started to
write this book and got stuck. I didn’t feel I had enough information about how to use signs and why I felt it was so important to have a visual reminder
to stay focussed. I was fortunate to be flying to New Zealand alone for a long weekend to celebrate my father’s 70th birthday and was getting excited
about having several hours to myself to read and not be interrupted, disturbed or needed for mother or wife duties. I started reading the book and
was instantly hooked. I was organised with highlighters, pencil and page markers and absorbed myself with what he was saying.



The first page simply sang out to me because of the silent sermon that Buddha gave about a flower. Therefore I am dedicating a whole chapter of my book
to his book, to tell you the messages I got from it, because what I learnt had such a profound effect on me. I finally got what my life’s purpose is:
to write this book, to get this message across to as many people as possible. I hope to affect your life in a positive way to help you. So this chapter
is a summary of Eckhart’s book in the hope that you read and learn from it too.

I want to simplify his messages and encourage you to read his books, and many others including the Bible, to help you be happy and find your luck. But
that is just some of my purpose. My purpose is also to enjoy every moment of every day. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow has not yet appeared, but I am
here, right now, writing this and you are here, right now, reading this. That is the point. I finally understood what all the books I had read were
saying. My heart is pounding while I write this because I can’t type fast enough to say how excited I am about how I found my enlightenment.



I have been searching for more than 20 years, and suddenly it hit me like a bolt of lightning. Even now, I need to remind myself daily to be happy,
because I need to give myself the time to contemplate and be in touch with my spirit. Buddha used the lotus flower, and the dove signifies the
Holy Spirit in Christianity. Visually reminding ourselves every day is awakening.

Your sign is your own personal signpost to shift your focus and attention. It really is hard to see the wood for the trees. In order to see what’s
in front of you, you need to stop looking at the forest and start trying different angles. In the forest there are trees, grass, flowers, birds,
insects, leaves, sunlight and space. That is a small list of what you can see if you look. Now imagine what you can’t see. The roots of the trees
underground that allow them to grow, worms to aerate the soil, ants, ladybirds and spiders, or even caterpillars just waiting to be butterflies!
Simply changing where you stand to see the forest allows your mind to see it differently. What would the forest look like from above?



By running through this exercise, you can start to think outside the box. Then you can stop letting your emotions, vision and preconceived perceptions
dictate your reality. Create a space that opens your mind and heart to see and feel more. The original voice in your head which told you what to
think when you see the forest is now not entirely accurate. There is more to the forest that you imagine when you take the time to stop, look and
feel it. The same can be said about what we think we are; Eckhart says, “The voice in my head is not who I am”. I am encouraging you to realise
that you are more than the labels you have given yourself. Seeing who you are not is part of realising who you are.

Even Buddha said, “Life isn’t as serious as my mind makes it out to be”. Stop and see the trees. Try and enjoy “just being”, and remember that “just
being” must be felt and not thought. We are our conscious mind and our subconscious mind. Dreams help resolve the conflict between the ego and
consciousness. We are our egos, I and me at the same time. We are living our own reality. What we are living right now is our experience; how we
interpret and feel about it will affect how we react and feel. Practice enjoying reading this. Smile. Breathe in and out four times.

Look around you and find something beautiful to look at. Look to your left, look right, look up, look down. I rented one of the worst rooms in a bedsit
in London once. I had a room with two single beds and found myself with a Spanish roommate. We shared a kitchen with another bedroom that was occupied
by an Italian girl. The whole floor shared a communal bathroom. There were rooms within rooms, behind doors and down a large corridor. Floor after
floor of rooms full of strangers. The rent was cheap for London prices, but it really was depressing and dismal.

The owner would come in and go through our belongings and my roommate had her heater confiscated, which left us cold in the winter. The reason I share
this story is because if I was reading this chapter and looking around that room, the most miserable place on the coldest of days, I would struggle
to see anything good. I understand how dark surroundings can be depressing, and yet I have very fond memories of laughing a lot there, and chatting
till the early hours in broken Spanish and Italian. The bright side of life was my roommates and not the surroundings.

I got a night job as well as a day job and saved even harder to get out of there, but that was the experience I needed at the time. Had I realised
then what I know now, I would have stuck the biggest, brightest, blue butterfly at the foot my bed as a reminder to stay focused—a visual
reminder to look on the bright side.



  • Do you feel lost and confused?
  • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
  • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
  • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
  • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
  • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
  • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
  • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
  • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

  • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
  • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
  • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we
    will all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey
    there is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we
    want.
  • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise
    the gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

Photo credit www.unsplash.com


 

 

Uncategorized

Are You Emotionally Stressed

Are You Emotionally Stressed

Every time you think or feel an emotion, it has an effect on your body and your body releases chemicals. When you feel happy your brain creates serotonin,
dopamine or oxytocin. When you are stressed your body releases cortisol.

These chemicals make your body react in different ways either positively or negatively. In reality, there is not actually a positive or negative, only
your perception of it! When you understand this, then you will realise you have a choice about how you feel or react. Our perception of an experience
is everything and yet the first step is accepting the situation as it is and how you feel.

The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. This might just
be a play on words but the word “loneliness” was created to express the pain of being alone, and the word “solitude” to express the glory of being
alone. Is it a play on words or more about how you perceive them? Don’t try to understand everything. Sometimes it is not meant to be understood, just
accepted.

This is exactly why I try and look at the positive in everything. The difficulties in life are intended to make us better, not bitter. Emotions and experiences are energy and your body processes and stores them. This can make you healthy or sick. Your body is connected
to your mind, you can have destructive thoughts, and this creates bad feelings.



When you feel happier you give off that vibe and your body feels happier. Is it “your sign finding you” or “you finding you sign”? Does it matter how your
sign finds you? No! Some days I wear butterfly jewellery just so I know I am surrounded and protected. Other times I see butterflies as tattoos or
stickers on cars.

No matter where I encounter my sign, I consider it as important in some way. I have butterfly stickers on by bathroom mirror. Some days I just don’t notice
them. Looking for your sign or seeing it is the same thing and either way it doesn’t matter. Encountering your sign is always a positive thing.

  • Do you feel lost and confused?
  • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
  • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
  • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
  • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
  • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
  • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
  • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
  • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

  • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
  • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
  • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate
    intelligence of the natural world. In life we will all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each
    individual and for every different journey there is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support
    us to create and live the life we want.
  • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise the
    gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

Photo credit www.unsplash.com


 

Uncategorized

Dealing With Adversity

Dealing With Adversity

Rainbows are my second sign:

I am fascinated by how they appear and I think they are the most beautiful spectacle nature has to offer. Rainbows are in fact very simple; they are just
a case of optics. In basic terms, we don’t see the white light that goes into a prism yet we can see the rainbow at the other end.



In a similar fashion, perspective works for us. What we put into our subconscious reflects who we are. You can look at a glass and call it half full or
half empty; it contains the same amount of water. I want you to view yourself, life, love and nature differently. Shit happens; how are you going to
deal with it? The author of the following tale is unknown, but it is a provoking story that will hopefully make you think about how you react when
adversity knocks on your door.

Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean? A young woman went to her mother and complained about how hard her life was. It seemed as if as soon as one problem was solved a new one arose. She said that she did not know how she was going to
continue and just wanted to give up: she was tired of fighting and struggling. Her mother took her to the kitchen. Her mother filled three pots with
water: in the first she placed carrots; in the second she placed eggs; in the last she placed ground coffee beans.



She put all three pots on the stove and let them come to a boil without saying a word. About twenty minutes later, she turned off the burners. She fished
out the carrots and put them in a bowl. Then she carefully lifted out the eggs and placed them in another bowl. Finally she ladled the coffee into
a third bowl. Turning to her daughter, she said, “Tell me what you see”. “Carrots, eggs, and coffee”, she replied, monosyllabically. The mother asked
her to feel the carrots, which she did, noting they felt soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. As the daughter took off the shell,
she observed the hard-boiled egg inside. Finally, the mother asked her to sip the coffee and the daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma. The
daughter then asked, “So, what’s the point, mother?”

Her mother explained that each item had faced the same adversity—boiling water— but each reacted differently.

  • The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but after being subjected to the boiling water, became soft and weak.
  • The egg, that had once been fragile and runny inside the shell, had now hardened as a result of the boiling water.
  • The ground coffee beans were unique, however: they thrived in the situation and worked to change the water, not themselves.

“Which are you?” she asked her daughter. “When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?”

Think about yourself, both how you are normally and how you react to challenges:

  • Are you the carrot that seems hard, but wilts and softens in the face of adversity? You appear as a weaker version of what you once were, a limp character
    without any strength.
  • Are you the egg, which starts off fluid, but hardens as a result of the difficulties faced; perhaps a death, a breakup, a divorce, or a layoff? Your
    shell looks the same, but your spirit and heart have toughened.
  • Or are you like the coffee bean and thrive in the face of adversity? If you are like the bean, you excel and flourish when things are at their worst
    and you actively work to make things around you better.

Put simply, things happen to us that we can’t control. But how we react to the situation
will determine our level of happiness. Change sometimes feels like being on a rollercoaster. The ups and downs can make you quite sick and some days
make you want to scream “Get me off”.

Life just doesn’t let you off though, but when things calm down, like the ride finishing, you can reflect on what you learnt. May you have enough happiness
to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes their way. The brightest future
will always be based on a forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

“I am a coffee bean”. That is my current mantra. It is easy for people and books to say “don’t stress” or “go with the flow and great things will come”,
but sometimes it’s impossible to see the light at the end of the tunnel. That’s why we need to work on staying positive and motivated. Zig Ziglar astutely
said, “Motivation doesn’t last. Bathing doesn’t either. That’s why I recommend it daily”.

  • Do you feel lost and confused?
  • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
  • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
  • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
  • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
  • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
  • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
  • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
  • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

  • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
  • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
  • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the
    innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we will all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however,
    for each individual and for every different journey there is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed
    to support us to create and live the life we want.
  • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise
    the gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

Photo credit www.unsplash.com




 

Uncategorized

Snakes and Ladders

Snakes and Ladders

Life’s a game. When you realise that, you can see it is entirely up to you how you choose to play and what character you will be.

Any game should be played with integrity and honesty to fully enjoy it, just try and have fun along the way and really live life. One fabulous weekend
away staying with friends, the most amazing conversation started at about 9.30pm. We openly discussed our late teens and early twenties and what we
would have done differently if we had had the knowledge we have now. Of course hindsight is a wonderful thing, but the light-hearted, story-telling
conversation quickly turned into a deep discussion about how we can help and influence our own children with the knowledge we have gained.

Our journeys through life have taught us valuable lessons and our experiences have shaped us into who we are today. No amount of teaching can prepare us
for living through the real events. Consider the jobs we have as teenagers, for example. I won a supermarket scanning competition; I had to stand on
the stage, greet the customer, scan the groceries, exchange money and give correct change as well as pack the groceries correctly to ensure nothing
got squashed or broken.

Another friend had won the Golden Spatula from McDonalds for greeting, ordering and packing the drive-through orders correctly. It was a bit of silly fun
which was appropriate for teenagers, and we enjoyed being recognised as a great employee. It’s interesting how these seemingly trivial things shaped our views and inspired us to greater things.

It’s impossible to measure how important these events are as we can’t go back and undo them; they are intrinsically embedded in our fabric and they help
shape our perspectives and goals for the future. There are lessons and obstacles in life that we parents can’t teach our children, but we can try to
prepare them to deal with the ups and downs life will throw at them. During the conversation we discussed whether life should be difficult or easy—how
much of what we did was influenced by rebelling against our parents or by learning the hard way. We were not trying to decide who was right or wrong,
but rather, just trying to understand how we have achieved things and how we might teach our children to aspire to be happy and successful.


Two hours later we had still not solved the world’s problems, and I went to bed thinking
it all over. It was very early in the morning when I realised we were all climbing different ladders, like the Snakes and Ladders game. You probably
played it as a child; I still play it now with my kids. If life is just a game, then imagine it is one giant game of Snakes and Ladders. You roll the
dice a few times to get going, and slowly but surely, step-by-step you start moving forward.

Everything is fine for a few turns and then the game starts. You feel pretty good until your next roll brings you to a snake’s head and you tumble all
the way down to its tail. You feel you have gone back several steps to where you were previously: one step forward, two steps back. It’s our ability
to overcome these setbacks that is important. When you are on the back foot and the others in the game seem so much further ahead of you, do you give
up or keep on rolling and hope that you catch back up to them? As it’s only a game and we were taught not to be sore losers, we continue to play.

Then, as we move forward again, we see our competitors start to slide, allowing us to catch up again. The other half of the game is the ladders. Suddenly
we roll the right number and land on a ladder that shoots us up higher and faster than we thought possible, right past the other players.

Now we feel great! It’s just a game, but life is like that. If you land on a snake
and slide down, treat it as a learning curve. See opportunities along the way and climb the ladders of life. We have all rolled the dice to the elusive
six that landed us on a huge ladder and boy it felt great. We’ve all played with team members who seem to always be lucky, but wouldn’t it be nice
if you were the lucky one?

You can be responsible for your own fate based on how you feel.

  • Do you feel lost and confused?
  • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
  • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
  • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
  • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
  • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
  • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
  • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
  • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

  • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
  • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
  • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we will
    all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey there
    is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we want.
  • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise the
    gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

Photo credit www.unsplash.com

 


 

Uncategorized

Finding Your Happiness

Finding Your Happiness

Some people go to extremes to find their happiness.

  • Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert documents her journey of eating in Italy, meditating in India and finding herself in Indonesia. Through the journey,
    she discovers peace within herself.
  • Living Deliberately by Harry Palmer is the result of him lying in a floatation tank for eight weeks to come up with his philosophy for the Avatar self-enlightenment
    course.
  • Eckhart Tolle quit his job and moved from England to America. He was running out of money to write his first book, won $1,000 on a lottery ticket and finished
    his first best seller.
  • These are extreme examples. Most of us have responsibilities and we like enough things about our lives not to chuck it all in, move country, contemplate
    our navel for weeks, meditate in ashrams in India, or lie in a coffin like water chamber. But you can make small changes to achieve great results.

    Take Action and Embrace Failure.

    Intentions and goals are not the same thing. You can set as many goals as you like, but if you have no intention of achieving them, they will simply not
    happen.

    The goal is the subject and the intention is the drive. An intention is stronger and more powerful than a goal. Intentions are the actions that allow you
    to reach your goals. 75% of million-dollar lotto winners are broke less than five years later. There are many theories to explain this—from not
    having great money skills to greed in sudden wealth—but I feel it’s a mindset issue.

    If, after winning, you do not feel deserving or worthy of the money, then you will sabotage yourself and let it slip through your fingers.


    There is also a difference between setting big goals and setting unrealistic ones. There is no point to setting yourself up to fail. However, there may
    be some steps along the way that don’t quite go how you intended or hoped. It is important to ensure that you don’t take this personally. Failing at
    a goal is nothing more or less than failing at the goal. It does not mean that you are a failure. It is difficult not to take it personally, and by
    all means allow yourself to shout into a pillow, throw rocks into a river, or do whatever it takes to release your frustration.

    But then, reflect on why the task—not you—was not successful. As Edison said, “I have not failed; I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work”.
    Rather than viewing it as failure, take it as a learning curve: What did you learn, and what would you do differently in the future? Did your head
    and heart work in unison? Another way to avoid failure is to ensure that you set realistic timescales for your goals.


    The price of success is much lower than the sacrifices and price of failure. Leadership expert
    Dr Demartini highlighted a dozen things that wealthy people do, which poor people don’t:

    • 80% of wealthy people are focused on accomplishing a single goal. Only 12% of the poor do this.
    • 76% of wealthy people exercise aerobically four days a week. Only 23% of the poor do this.
    • 63% of wealthy people listen to audio books during their commute to work. 5% of poor people do this.
    • 81% of wealthy people maintain a to-do list. Only 19% of poor people do this.
    • 67% of wealthy people write down their goals. Only 17% of poor people do this.
    • 88% of wealthy people read for 30 minutes or more each day for education or career reasons. Only 2% of poor people do this.
    • 79% of wealthy people network five hours or more each month. Only 16% of poor people do this.
    • 67% of wealthy people watch one hour or less of TV every day. Only 23% of poor people do this.
    • 44% of wealthy people wake up three hours before work starts. Only 3% of poor people do this.
    • 74% of wealthy people teach good daily success habits to their children. Only 1% of poor people do this.
    • 84% of wealthy people believe good habits create opportunity luck. Only 4% of poor people believe this.
    • 86% of wealthy people believe in lifelong educational self-improvement. Only 5% of poor people believe this. 

    This last habit is key. The wealthiest people I know are always asking questions: How can I play a bigger game in my life? What’s the one thing I can do
    right now to take my results to a new level? What book can I read? Who can I talk to? What seminar can I attend? They’re in the business of constant,
    never-ending improvement. This continual learning curve allows them to consistently achieve breakthrough results.

    Learning Patience We have been taught at school or work that when we write down our goals we should give them a time frame to ensure they happen. If we
    don’t achieve our goals within these time frames, we get annoyed and criticise ourselves. Patience is not well respected in this fast-paced world,
    but it’s a valuable skill to acquire. Our goals are not achieved by one spasmodic burst of effort; our job is to find some joy along the way and confirmation
    that we are on the right track.


    This is where using and being aware of your can cue sign can help quell everyday doubts. I happened to be in the right place and the right time and found
    When I Relax I Feel Guilty by Tim Hansel for 50 cents at a church fete. I trusted my intuition and snapped it up. The opening page has the poem “Slow
    Me Down, Lord” by Orin L. Crain. This poem really resonates with me. Here is the best part:

    Slow Me Down, Lord Teach me the art of taking minute vacations— of slowing down to look at a flower, to chat with a friend, to pat a dog, to smile
    at a child, to read a few lines from a good book. Conversely, the band Oasis released a rockumentary film entitled, “Lord Don’t Slow Me Down”, charting
    their successes in striving for achievements. The key is to know when to stop and smell the roses and when to take action.

    • Do you feel lost and confused?
    • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
    • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
    • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
    • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
    • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
    • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
    • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
    • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

    I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
    you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

    • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
    • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
    • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we will
      all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey there
      is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we want.
    • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise the
      gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

    Photo credit www.unsplash.com


     

     

    Uncategorized

    Setting Goals One Step at a Time

    Setting Goals One Step at a Time

    Goals are defined as stating plans which go towards achieving a desired end-point. Most goals are defined within a set time period or by a deadline. The
    dictionary further states that “a desire or an intention becomes a goal if, and only if, one activates an action for achieving it”.

    The key words here are “if, and only if”, because that means action is required to define something as a goal. You must actually do something to achieve
    it if you are going to call it a goal. So many people have watched “The Secret” and
    then wished for a BMW to appear outside their home.

    Unless you have a very rich relative, most of us realise that no matter how much we think about it, that elusive BMW is not going to just appear magically
    outside the house. We must do something to make it happen. Once you’ve decided what your goal is, the easy part is over. Writing down something you
    want to achieve— verbalising it and visualising it—is the easy part; the action required to make it happen is the difficult part. We can’t
    just visualise the goal without picturing what we need to do in order to attain the end result.

    Although I know it’s part of my life’s purpose, this book seemed such a mammoth undertaking with my responsibility for two children under six and my everyday
    chores. And yet once I broke it down and wrote out my plan, slowly but surely it came together. I told my husband, “If I can write one page a day,
    then by the end of the year I will have 365 pages”. I then asked, “What if I write two pages a day?” His response was, “Then you will have over 700
    pages”, whereas I happily realised I could get it written in half the time. Either way, bit by bit I could actually get this book written, one or two
    pages per day.


    I have had this book idea for a few years now and the people I have shared it with have loved the idea. I have gone from being a fulltime mum with two
    toddlers to working fulltime, and I have always had to squeeze in time to write this book. I exercise at 6.00am most mornings.

    At work, sometimes I have to get in early to talk to associates in the US and stay late to communicate with those in Europe. At home, I am a mother of
    two, with all the work that entails. As a wife, I do the finances for my family and manage our investment portfolio. I am no hero and have a wonderful
    husband, but I am busy and yet still find time to focus daily on my long-term goals. I know that by focusing I am happier.

    I don’t want to work fulltime for a large international company. I have earned more per year in real estate than I do from my annual salary, but as I write
    this I am eternally grateful for my current job since it is the only reason the bank will lend us more money. Doing my job does not make me as happy
    as doing other things, but I am grateful for it as it helps me achieve my long-term goal of getting us our own home.



    If you’ve ever attended a motivational seminar, chances are you have seen the presenter take a $50 bill from their pocket and ask, “What would you do to
    get this?” Many people shout out their answers, but the one who gets it is the person who stands up from their chair, goes onstage, grabs it, and keeps
    it. The point is that it’s available to anyone prepared to get up and take action. 

    • Do you feel lost and confused?
    • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
    • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
    • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
    • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
    • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
    • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
    • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
    • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

    I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
    you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

    • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
    • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
    • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we will
      all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey there
      is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we want.
    • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise the
      gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

    Photo credit www.unsplash.com


     

    Uncategorized

    Motivation Gets You Going And Habit Gets You There

    Motivation Gets You Going And Habit Gets You There

    Motivational trainer Zig Ziglar said, “Motivation gets you going and habit gets
    you there.

    Make motivation a habit and you will get there more quickly and have more fun on the trip”. We are all creatures of habit. Some of us relish change more
    than others, but no matter what type of person you are, you have routines. Even the most disorganised or avant-garde person has routines.

    The dictionary describes routine as:

    • A prescribed, detailed course of action to be followed regularly; a standard procedure.
    • A set of customary and often mechanically performed procedures or activities.

    I underestimated how much kids love routines. It’s not so much about timing as it is about doing the same thing over and over again. Bath time is a ritual
    in our house and is cemented into our daily routine. My kids love bath time. They splash. They giggle. They sing. They play with toys. In the summer
    they get to run round the house in the nuddy afterwards till bedtime. Most routines we do unconsciously.


    Take getting dressed for example and think about it next time, do you put your underwear on first or your socks? Do you put your bottom half on before
    your top? The likelihood is that you put your clothes on in the same order every day, out of habit or routine. You don’t usually notice a routine until
    it is broken, then something feels wrong although you might not be able to identify it. Routines let us know what to expect.

    Most routines are done on autopilot, with us simply relying on our subconscious
    to perform the functions. You don’t consciously think about blinking, walking or breathing, but these are simple routine actions. Have you ever driven
    home and wondered how you got there when you reach to put your keys in the front door? Have you spent the day worrying that you left the hob on, only
    to return and find that of course it was off because it’s a routine action to turn it off after cooking? We do so many things on autopilot; therefore
    we can easily miss something we are not looking for.

    Why would you pay attention to the route home when you know it like the back of your hand? Why would you memorise turning the hob off when you finished
    cooking as it’s just a natural action? I am not suggesting that you create more routines, but being more aware of what you are doing will open your
    eyes to what else there is to see. You may have passed something really interesting on the way home yesterday, but you didn’t see it because you were
    just stuck in your routine. If you had paid attention you would have seen the opportunity.


    When we step out of our comfort zones we feel uncertain and scared, but we are
    also paying more attention as we don’t know what to expect. Being more aware can be as simple as doing something slightly differently. Try some of
    these suggestions to shake up your routine and see what else you notice as a result:

  • Brush your teeth with the opposite hand
  • Drive home on a different route
  • Have a cup of tea instead of coffee
  • Do two minutes of star jumps while you are waiting for the jug to boil 
  • Drive with the window down to catch the wind on your face and pick up sounds and smells and sights (I always have a brush in the glove compartment because
    I want to feel the wind and still look respectable at my destination) 
  • Don’t just take my word for it.

    How about these excerpts from Tim Hansel’s When I Relax I Feel Guilty:

    “Do something unusual. Be an experimenter. Meet new people, try new experiences. Let people think you’re loony. Wear a funny hat or put your shirt on backwards
    for a day… Hug a tree, fly a kite, wear a button, jog in triangles. Go for a long walk in your bare feet. Poke some holes in your rigidity.

    This is not a time to be timid. Take a chance, it’s worth it. When was the last time you caught yourself enjoying life so deeply that you couldn’t quite
    get the smile off your face? Chances are, it’s been too long”. Ben Franklin said, “There’s a time to wink as well as to see”.

    • Do you feel lost and confused?
    • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
    • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
    • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
    • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
    • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
    • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
    • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
    • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

    I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
    you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

    • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
    • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
    • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we will
      all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey there
      is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we want.
    • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise the
      gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.


     


    Uncategorized

    Find Your Calm. Conquer Your Chaos.

    Find Your Calm. Conquer Your Chaos.

    Having the ability to find your calm, especially during crisis, is a talent you can acquire with practice.

    When a crisis occurs, there is typically no early warning, and the only thing we can control during the crisis is our reaction to it. In the midst of chaos,
    we typically don’t have enough time to learn new things, so we fall back on what is available: our existing knowledge. It is a far better strategy,
    I think you will agree, to prepare beforehand.

    The Concept of “Find” The act of finding involves discovery and occurs either by design or chance. When we find treasure, for example, we are either intentionally
    looking for it or we stumble upon it unexpectedly. The noun version of “find” relates to the idea of an object that has been discovered, one with some
    value, as in “It was quite a find.”

    We can proactively involve ourselves in the discovery process or something might appear in our reality and show itself to us with no prompting. This may
    be our sign. The dictionary defines “find” as: “identify something as being present” When you “find” an object, you basically identify it as being
    present. The concept of “find” relates to the concept of “being present” since that which is found must be present along with that which finds it (you),
    therefore, we are present during the discovery process.

    The word “find” has other meanings. You can find yourself or find a treasure. Consider the following meaning on dictionary.com:

    • “To become aware of, or discover (oneself), as being in a condition or location.” Dictionary.com gives the following example:
    • “After a long illness, he found himself well again.” Another example from that same resource:
    • “She woke to find herself alone.” Note that this definition involves recognizing an internal state. We will discuss that in the next section. 

    The Concept of “Calm” The concept of calm can be described by invoking its opposite (what it means to NOT be calm): the process of not showing nervousness,
    anger or other strong emotions. This doesn’t mean you ignore your feelings; rather, it means to exhibit a calm demeanor.

    To explore the concept of calm, let us consider a river. It can appear calm on the surface but the undercurrents and swirling water below the surface can
    be quite turbulent and seemingly unpredictable. Water movement—the swirling and turbulence—might at first seem to be a random process,
    but flowing bodies of water have an underlying repeating pattern: streams and rivers meander. Meandering occurs in streams and rivers of all sizes,
    from a few inches wide to one that is kilometres wide.


    The movement of water seems random, but it flows with regularity and purpose. The channel of a river curves back and forth on itself through a valley.
    Each spring (unless there is a dam upstream), snow in the mountains melts, the water rises and the stream might jump the banks to form a new channel
    or an oxbow.

    Scientists used to think meandering was random— until someone noticed on infrared satellite images that a warm river flowing into a cold ocean continues
    to meander, even when there is no land to flow over. It turns out this meandering process is highly mathematical and deterministic in certain ways.
    It relates to fractals and chaos theory. So we have calm on the surface and calm under the surface as well (since turbulence can be described mathematically
    by chaos theory). In a similar fashion, when a crisis strikes, we can remain calm on the surface and conquer the chaos around and within us.

    A synonym of calm is to be still, tranquil, quiet, serene and peaceful. We are composed; we have presence of mind, and we are self-controlled. When you
    can “find yourself” and remain calm during chaos or crisis, you are better able to make optimal decisions than when your mind is erratic and you are
    reacting irrationally and driven by strong emotions.

    Calm does not mean you ignore your feelings or push them deeper and deeper and pretend they don’t exist. It means that during the crisis you acknowledge
    your feelings. You become aware that feelings are inside you and feelings are there to guide you. You can then respond from a calmer place and a moment
    of peace saves you a lifetime of regret as you can never take back the words you say or the actions you take when you are angry and out of control.


    Consider a road rage incident on the motorway. When another driver becomes confrontational you can become angry or emotional and react irrationally.
    You can speed up and pass the other driver and maybe swerve over at them or block their path. This has a high probability of inducing a negative
    outcome. Another alternative is to simply leave the road on the next exit, wait a few minutes and then reenter the freeway.

    If you do this, you are introducing a slight randomness into the road rage incident that will likely end the incident. Conversely, if you get in a
    road rage incident and you engage the other driver in a confrontational manner, then most likely there will be a negative outcome. The universe
    has presented you with an action, expecting you to react to that action. If you exit the roadway for a few minutes, you will break the pattern
    and the expected result (a negative confrontation) will change.

    In this case you have broken the expectation. You have invested a few minutes of your time and you have made your life more positive. Consider another example: relationships. It turns out that victims of abusive relationships tend to
    exit one relationship and then enter another abusive relationship. For some reason the pattern repeats itself. It turns out that these individuals
    may have grown up in a family where the father abused the mother, so they tend to find similar relationships. So on the surface, the life of this
    abused person seems to be chaotic and highly disorganized.

    There is a lot of abuse and all the relationships tend to be abusive. However, as with the river and turbulence, there is an underlying pattern. As
    with the road rage, there is an underlying pattern in the chaos, a pattern that can be described mathematically (see chaos theory). The abused
    person will repeatedly enter abusive relationships unless they take some small action to disrupt the process. To do so, they must first recognize
    that a pattern exists and if they take a small action (like exiting the roadway) they can break the pattern and avoid a negative outcome.

    Your calm is like a drop of water being added to an ocean, it has the ability to ripple out and affect the
    outcome, like the proverbial “butterfly effect.” Or you can stir the water up more and create a whirlpool. When deciding how to write this chapter,
    I felt very calm and in control and organized. Then my daughter came home from school. Her emotions were erratic; she was tired, grumpy, and hormonal
    and she could not explain everything she was feeling.

    The chaos began! “There is no food in the house,” she said (which means there is nothing she likes to snack on). “You don’t care
    if I starve,” she said (which means all I am thinking about is me and you don’t care and I am going to shout at you because you are the closest
    person around right now to unleash all my frustration on). If she had recognized the pattern of a confrontation, and she had stopped and not taken
    it to the next level then the situation would not have escalated as quickly as it did.

    The more I explained that I had gone shopping and spent hundreds of dollars, the more she complained it was not the food she wanted and she didn’t
    care about the everyday basics I bought for her. Her comments escalated into a personal attack. The calmer I remained the angrier she became, but
    I was very upset, under the surface. I said I was done with the conversation as this situation was going nowhere.

    I refused to add fuel to the fire because no matter what I did or said it was not what she wanted to see or hear. Of course she perceived this as me
    giving her the “silent treatment.” Some days it’s tough being a parent. I asked myself why I deserved this. How did I create this?


    How could I have brought this on myself when I was so high spirited and about to teach people how to find their calm and conquer their chaos and yet
    I could not stop her barrage of insults? This continued into the following day. Usually after a good night’s sleep there is an apology and an explanation
    of her outburst. But this did not happen. By lunchtime she was not talking to me and still throwing insults. I picked up a book in the afternoon
    to give myself some quiet time and this is what I read: “The first thing we have to do in our everyday life is to change our attitude.

    When someone disturbs us we have to take that opportunity to practice patience. Peace of mind comes from our enemy and our anger disappears. Friends
    don’t give us the opportunity to practice patience, we rely on enemies for that.” My daughter and I had both wanted this to be over but neither
    of us knew how to end it.

    I know this might sound too easy but as quickly as I said it the anger disappeared. I calmly said, “Thank you for allowing me to practice patience.”
    Her reply was so simple: “You’re welcome.” I had been asking for a way to remain calm when it was chaos that I had no control over, and I was tested
    to remain calm and patience. Now that the anger had gone, we talked about what happened and what consequences there would be as I could forgive
    her but it was not OK what she said. I found my calm, and chaos was now in order.


    In effect, when she presented me with a confrontational situation, instead of reacting to her and engaging her with a negative response—which
    in turn would cause the situation to escalate into a negative outcome—I remained calm. I avoided the pattern of confrontation. Like exiting
    the highway to avoid a road rage episode, I avoided the situation to overcome a crisis. I found my calm to conquer my chaos.

    Find your Calm. Conquer your Chaos:

    • Do you feel lost and confused?
    • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
    • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
    • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
    • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
    • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
    • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
    • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
    • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

    I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
    you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

    • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
    • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
    • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we
      will all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey
      there is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we
      want.
    • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise
      the gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

    Photo credit www.unsplash.com

     


     

    Uncategorized

    Feel What Is Around You Even If You Can’t See It Yet.

    Feel What Is Around You Even If You Can’t See It Yet.

    I once asked a pilot how a plane flew. I simply couldn’t understand how a craft of that many tonnes just hurtles down a runway, gaining speed, and then
    suddenly takes off. If I run fast, or drive fast in my car, I don’t take to flight. He likened it to a surfboard; when you stand on it in still water,
    both you and the board sink. When a wave comes however, if you angle the board correctly, you rise above the water and it propels you forward. It was
    a “light bulb” moment for me.

    I actually understood how the air underneath the plane makes it lift by comparing it to something I understood and could feel.



    Leonardo Da Vinci studied birds and how they fly. His allegory went something like this: the air to a bird is like water to us. If you lie in water and
    slowly bring your arms from above your head down to your sides, you will stay still. If you move your arms faster, you will move.

    A bird is the same; if they flap their wings slowly they stay put, but if they flap harder then it’s like swimming, and they fly. I am on a plane as I
    write this and it’s 6.00am. It’s slightly cool outside, but hey; it’s Queensland so it’s about 22 degrees already, just cooler than it will be during
    the day. I really love taking off; it’s exhilarating travelling so fast and knowing you are “going” somewhere, having a new adventure, or returning
    back to a familiar place.

    I watched a flow of air over the wing just before take-off and as we rose. It reminded me of how we fly and, more importantly, that because I can’t see something, it does not mean it is not there. It was like glancing at a rainbow. The colours are all around us, but
    until we really look in the right conditions the rainbow does not appear.

    I know there is so much more around me; it would be naive of me to ignore it, so I make sure to remind myself to feel, see and experience everything. On
    my previous trip, a month ago, as we rose above the clouds the cabin crew announced that we could use electronic equipment, so I took a beautiful picture
    of the clouds just below me.

    When I showed my children the image, their first comment was that it looked like snow. And it did. It doesn’t matter that the picture is of clouds; when
    I look at it, the thought of snow makes me and my children smile. And that is better than any picture or words. Imagine the possibilities if I stopped
    labelling things and just allowed things to be? Stop seeing what you think, and just look. Feel what is around you even if you can’t see it yet.

    • Do you feel lost and confused?
    • Are you constantly second guessing yourself?
    • Lack self-confidence and self-esteem?
    • Do you have no patience and snap at the kids?
    • Does your heart race and beat so loud and yet you can’t explain why?
    • Mental heaviness weighting you down making you exhausted?
    • Not sleeping well and constantly tired and foggy?
    • Constantly helping others and racing around but have no time or energy for yourself?
    • Feel guilty all the time and out of control?

    I hope you enjoyed this exert from my book the Road to Resilience. The book is a journey, where
    you will discover the keys to being confident, calm and in control no matter what life presents:

    • There is a better way to LIVE your LIFE. Stop trying to cope and get by and learn how to move beyond the CHAOS right now
    • What would your life look and feel like if every challenge you faced was actually supporting you?
    • The Road to Resilience is an easy-to-follow insight on understanding and working with the innate intelligence of the natural world. In life we
      will all walk a very individual journey peppered with challenge and confrontation, however, for each individual and for every different journey
      there is an ever-connected sub-conscious rhythm of life that when understood can be harnessed to support us to create and live the life we
      want.
    • If you are ready to get out of your head and tap into the knowingness that life can be more – for you and your family – take a moment to realise
      the gift in your hands and indulge in a new way of being – your way of being.

    Photo credit www.unsplash.com